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Wednesday, December 5, 2007

Anxiety

Well, this is the time of year that the inevitable happens. And no, I'm not talking about the stress of Christmas shopping, finding babysitters for all of our Christmas parties, or just the general hustle and bustle of this busy holiday season. My anxiety comes from of a different source: the fear of being discovered! For all of you parents out there, let me lay it down for you. I have had my Christmas shopping done for about a month now. This means that for the last month Christmas presents have been shopped for, delivered by my friendly neighborhood UPS guy (who I should know on a first name basis, yet strangely, I don't) and hidden in the depths of the basement. (Let's talk about "hidden" for a minute. This is not just your run of the mill "put your kids presents in your closet and hope that they don't go in there."These babies are hidden behind two locked doors, which if the kids manage to get through are yet behind another closed door (the furnace room) that I seriously doubt the kids even know exist!) Even still, let's pretend they even got that far. This is what they would see when they opened the door: a pant-load of amazon.com boxes, with the tops all closed, stacked on top of one another, with absolutely nothing of any worth showing at all!
But let me tell you, last night it happpened. I had the very first of one of my "Christmas" anxiety dreams. Let me break it down for you. You know those dreams where you are back in high school (yet you don't weigh the 105 pounds that you did in high school, which really sucks) you are instead you, in the current day. Now here are a couple scenarios. You have forgotten your locker combination and can't for the life of you seem to remember it, yet you try and try to get that sucker open. OR, there is a certain class that you haven't gone to all semester and now it's time to take the final, only you realize you don't know what in the heck you're going to be tested on. OR you show up to school with only a towel on. I could go on and on with many variations of the same dream, but needless to say, whenever I find myself having a dream like this, I have to step back and wonder what I have ANXIETY about in my life. But, at this time of year, and yes, It happens every year, I know exactly where the source is coming from. So, for less than three more weeks I will continue to experience stress in the form of random and meaningless dreams, until Christmas days arrives, and one more year gone without being discovered. Phew, I don't know how many more years I can pull this off.
Sweet Dreams.